Hurrah, hooray.  I am finally a permanent member of staff so I can now carry on doing exactly what I have been doing for the last 8 months indefinately.
My coaching paid off and my manager told me my interview was "10, no, 100 times better than last time."  Good, it couldn't really have got much worse than that last one.  I "wanked on" about myself as advised.  I must be good at wanking.

So, watch out unemployed of South D.